I can't stop crying.
God is certainly testing my faith right now.
I feel so helpless, so depressed, so needy--but also feel like I don't have anywhere to turn. Marty's busting his butt working his two jobs so I don't want to just unload on him during the little time we have together. We talked a little bit this afternoon on his break between shifts and I think it just made matters worse.
As he drove away, I was crying and he was equally upset. His last words to me were, "Are we ever going to be able to genuinely smile?" It broke my heart.
And yeah, it's a little extreme to be thinking that way. But sometimes it feels like we've been forgotten. Like we're meant to spend our lives feeling lonely and desperate. Seems as though right when we begin to feel content, God rips something out of our hands and we're left figuring out how to start over. It makes me want to harden my heart and no longer put myself out there at the risk of being hurt.
Guess I just have to remind myself that the Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.
5 comments:
I am so sorry you are having a hard time, I know I have felt this same way so many times, even though I don't know what you are going through specifically I am praying for you. Let me know if you want to talk.
My prayers are with you, Becky. I'm sorry life feels heavy for you. God really is with you in this time. He is wise and good, and He loves you.
Please know that I would love to chat if you want. You are beautiful!
We love you Becky. I am praying for you right now.
As a random friend from a while ago, i'm giving you a mental hug right now. We are going thru our own tear-filled moments right now, so i pray that you get thru this quickly.
Hi Sweet Becky, We love you. I've been there. I know it hurts. Yet, one day at a time God pulled me through. Whatever it is know that you have complete support of your family and we will help whatever way we can. Sending you a big long hug.
Love, B&C
Post a Comment